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- The Drum Singers
16
Sergeant Tao was a good-looking young man, tall and well-built, with a clear ivory skin and bright eyes. He was polite and cordial, as a true northerner should be, but although he was basically kind, his years in the army had hardened his good nature and calloused his feelings. He could be tough and cunning. He had a polished manner, which made people like him, but it was hard to tell when he was sincere. He had not known his real self for so long, he had forgotten how he used to be.
He had a mixed notion of what profit from any deal should come to him. For instance, that strange affair of Pao Ching, the drum singer and his daughter. Sergeant Tao had really meant to help Pao Ching because he came from the north — and two northerners should help each other. But he had not told Pao Ching and Lotus Charm the best way to save themselves, before they were interviewed by Madame Wang. Yet when Lotus Charm talked back to the old lady, Sergeant Tao was sure that he was the savior of the Fang family. They owed him everything, and as grateful fellow northerners, should show their appreciation in an appropriate way.
He was a frequent visitor to South Warm Springs, managing to be in town on business almost every day. He began by bringing Mrs. Fang bunches of flowers from the gardens of the Wang mansion, and a basket or two of vegetables. And who could send such a kind sergeant away without a drink or two and a well-cooked meal?He certainly was a charming fellow. Of course his gifts cost him nothing, but having to entertain him regularly was a strain on the Fang budget.
And Sergeant Tao was no mean drinker. He was in fact the most fabulous drinker Pao Ching had ever met. His capacity seemed to be limitless. When he got drunk his face might grow a trifle pale, but his conversation was always amusing. Never did he annoy anyone, or become insulting, and if he paid himself occasional compliments that was understandable.
Pao Ching had met all kinds of people in his travels through the years, but he did not know how to classify Sergeant Tao. He was not sure that he liked him, but he could never be certain that he disliked him. When he was away from the sergeant he didn't like him at all, but when the sergeant was around, Pao Ching was often convinced that he was the best of fellows.
Yet there was much about Sergeant Tao that he did not like. The man was too smooth, too anxious to please, too free with other people's drink.
With Mrs. Fang, Sergeant Tao got along very well. Mrs. Fang liked men of all kinds, but with Sergeant Tao she was completely at ease. She liked Meng Liang too, but he was different — too remote, with his education and culture. Sure, he could play cards and smile, but when Sergeant Tao was around she felt that she had never really risen to Meng Liang's level. She could, of course, understand the sergeant better, because he came from the north. His colloquialisms were the same as hers, and his mentality was much the same too. She understood and laughed at his jokes without trouble.
Day after day the two would sit together making jokes and telling off-color stories. Mrs. Fang was an accomplished flirt. When she was sparring with a man, she knew just the right intonation and how to use her eyes. She had no interest in the sergeant, nor in any man, but it kept her from being bored to exchange stories with him. As for Sergeant Tao, he knew how to handle Mrs. Fang. If she tried to play up to him, he would slip out of the situation and still be friends with her. This he had learned from being an orderly to Commander Wang, who had several concubines, some of whom had cast meaningful glances at the handsome young soldier.
To Mrs. Fang, Sergeant Tao told the story of his life. He was an ambitious law-abiding young man. One dream of his life was to be married and to raise a family, but as yet he had not found a suitable wife. These local bumpkins!He shook his sleek head. Well, how could a northerner marry into such families. And as he spoke, his eyes strayed to where Phoenix Girl was sitting at the window, looking like a forlorn little sparrow waiting to take flight. Yes, lamented Sergeant Tao softly, he had as yet not met the right family to provide him with a wife.
Inside Mrs. Fang something kindled. The sergeant would make a fine son-in-law. That's what she wanted — a nice handsome fellow around. That would be just the thing for her declining years.
Sergeant Tao rarely passed up the opportunity to get something good for himself. Phoenix Girl might be no beauty, but she was a virgin, tight and trim, and that would be fun for a few nights. And she could cook, and keep house. Also, she would be a link with the Fangs who he felt were worth cultivating. Old man Fang obviously had money; else how would he have paid all that bribe money to Commander Wang. It made good sense. He could marry the girl, have fun with her for a while, and at the same time milk the old folks.
One night he and Mrs. Fang discussed the matter seriously. She had been coy at first, opposing the marriage just to tease him, but Sergeant Tao was outspoken and convincing. Suppose Commander Wang wanted to make more trouble for the family. If their daughter was married to Wang's sergeant, how could he do such a thing?And when the day came for him to quit Wang's service, what wonderful things he could do for the Fangs. How could they miss the opportunity of acquiring such a son-in-law?He stood up and flexed his muscles. “See my strength. When I'm standing in the lobby of your theater, do you think anyone would dare start anything?And I have worked for Commander Wang. What an honor for your husband. Don't tell me he doesn't need a person like me."
That night Mrs. Fang talked to Pao Ching about marrying off Phoenix Girl to the sergeant. At first Pao Ching was shocked. Then he viewed it as a reasonable proposition. He was glad that the sleek sergeant hadn't picked on Lotus Charm. But was it right to sacrifice Phoenix Girl?The sergeant was surely not innocent. He might have been married before. Well, if he was, how could one find out in wartime?He had many things that would make him a good son-in-law. After all, he was around most of the time sponging on the family, so why not let him marry the girl?
All night Pao Ching argued with himself. Phoenix Girl should get married and settle down. He would ask her if she cared to marry, if she liked Sergeant Tao. If she did, well and good. Once she was married she would be out of the family, and was it not written somewhere that a parent could not look after his children all their lives?Stupid even to think one could.
When he asked Phoenix Girl, she blushed. But when she blushed Pao Ching knew that meant yes, so he accepted it. And yet he was worried. Perhaps he hadn't been fair to her. This odd child of his, although she was his own flesh and blood, had never had a definite place in the family. Always she had taken a back seat to Lotus Charm, the adopted daughter. And she was so retiring that her mother got mad at her. Well, this was her fate, to be married to Sergeant Tao, who had asked for her. He would do his duty as a parent. There would be a grand wedding, as lavish as the village could provide. He would give her a dowry and a complete trousseau for the four seasons, and some of the jewelry he had stored away. No one would say that his daughter was married like a streetwalker. He knew his etiquette. A wedding in the Fang family would be a wedding to remember wherever it took place. Show people, perhaps, but show people with style.
Just after the New Year, Sergeant Tao posted his deposit for the marriage with two of the town's leading citizens. Two rings were wrapped in separate red papers, on which the sergeant wrote his birthdate. To celebrate the contract, Pao Ching gave a dinner at the town's best Cantonese restaurant. The guests of honor were the mayor of South Warm Springs who registered the intention of marriage, the police chief, the leader of the fire brigade, and their friends. Pao Ching also invited the Tangs and Little Liu. This was his opportunity to show them that when his daughter got married, he could do things properly.
Lotus Charm tried hard to talk to Phoenix Girl about her forthcoming marriage. The night of the dinner Phoenix Girl looked radiant in a green silk dress. It was the first time that Lotus Charm had ever seen her look nice, but she had been strangely silent all through the proceedings, holding her flushed face high and seeing no one.
“I'll be so lonely when you are gone," Lotus Charm said that night as they prepared to go to bed. Phoenix Girl did not answer. Lotus Charm flung herself down on her knees and took Phoenix Girl's hand in hers. “Please say something, elder sister. Talk to me for once."
“I want to go," said Phoenix Girl dimly. “There's nothing for me here. No position, no comfort, no home life, no love. So I'll take my chance. If you marry the dog, follow the dog; if you marry the cockerel, follow him. What else can I do?I cannot earn a living. I can only follow you and father from place to place. No one ever notices me, no one wants me. I loathe not knowing how to make money, and I hate being your shadow. You are beautiful. You can sing, people look at you and want you. No one ever wanted me, except Sergeant Tao." She smiled wanly. “When I'm married I'll know that I have the same ability as other women, to quit a man's passion."
Lotus Charm looked hurt. This strange girl talking like this. And after all the years she had tried to be nice and friendly to her. “Do you hate me, elder sister?" she asked coolly.
Phoenix Girl shook her head. “I don't hate you. Your lot is worse than mine. You can't have a formal wedding like me. For that I pity you."
She might better have driven an arrow through Lotus Charm's heart.
“Look at Jeweled Lute," Phoenix Girl continued. “Why does my father dare invite her to our house?If she's out of jail, she is coming to the wedding, he says. She sleeps with Little Liu and many others as well. She's a drum singer, the same as you."
Lotus Charm's eyes flashed venom. Her lips were thin white lines. “So you think I'm like her," she said impatiently. “You don't hate me. You just don't consider me — as if I were rubbish in the gutter."
Phoenix Girl shrugged her lumpy shoulders. “I don't know," she said, “I don't know what I think about you."
Lotus Charm spoke after a long pause. “Elder sister, please pretend that you love me — just for make_believe. I have never been loved by anyone. You know how mother treats me, so please, you be different. Just say that you love me and that you and I are best friends. Say it, even if you don't mean it. Give me some consolation. You know I haven't one person who really loves me, and I want someone to love me." She bit her lips and the tears bubbled in her eyes. “I do, I want someone to like me."
“All right," conceded Phoenix Girl, “I love you, stupid. I am your best friend."
Lotus Charm wiped her tears. Presently she asked, “Aren't you afraid to be married to a strange man?Do not think he'll treat you well?"
“Of course I'm afraid, but what can I do?I'm just a girl. Nothing is ever right for a woman in this life. We're animals. You are different, because you earn money, but what does that get you. People look down on you because you sing for a living. I can't earn money, so I have to do as I am told, and get married. There's no other way out. A man's going to get me, but he'll have to sign a paper and eat a big dinner first. Ha!ha!"
Lotus Charm thought for a while. “Do you think those girl students are the same as we are?"
“How should I know?" retorted Phoenix Girl bitterly. “I have never been a student." She began to cry, the tears gushing down her face.
Lotus Charm wept too. Poor Phoenix Girl. So all these years she had felt lonely and unwanted. And now she was to be married. It meant that she, Lotus Charm, would move up in the family. Would they marry her to a stranger?Who could tell?She remembered what her mother had said: “There never is a happy ending for a theatrical girl." And Phoenix Girl said she hadn't a chance of being married formally as she was going to be. She would have to be a streetwalker like Jeweled Lute. Well, was that any different from being married to a stranger for the money your father could put on your head?
She went over and sat on the bed, where her book was lying. She tried to read, but all at once the printed words made no sense. They seemed to say: “Lotus Charm, you are just a drum singer — Jeweled Lute the second. Who do you think you are?Who?What ideas do you have?Forget them. You'll never be happy."
When Meng Liang arrived to give her a lesson she was struggling with her book. “I would like to ask you something that's not in the book," she said with a smile.
“Of course, Lotus Charm, go ahead." Meng put his hand in his pocket, and fingered a peanut he found in the lining of his jacket.
“Mr. Meng," Lotus Charm demanded, “what is love?"
Meng Liang looked cheerfully helpless. Then he said, “Why ask me about such a big problem all at once?There's really no answer."
“You mean no one knows?"
“Everyone knows, but no one understands. But why do you ask this, Lotus Charm?" Meng Liang's thin face was serious. He sat down on the chair opposite and stared curiously at her.
Lotus Charm licked her thin lips. “I want to know because I know nothing. I have no brothers or sisters. No friends. No one loves me. Men follow me, and want to pinch me. Is that love?My sister is getting married to a man she doesn't know. He'll sleep with her, and she'll cook for him. Is that love?Young men and girl students walk in the park hand in hand, and lie kissing in the grass. Is that love?Jeweled Lute goes to bed with any man who will give her a dollar. Is that love?"
Meng Liang blew a loud breath as if puffing invisible smoke from his stomach. “Take it easy, girl. How can I answer all those questions at once?I can't, so let's try just one of them. Your sister's marriage, for instance. That's not love. It's a kind of horrible legacy bestowed on us by ancient custom. She has to obey her parents, and marry some man, when she is old enough. If she were modern and everyone were modern, she would choose her own husband."
“Like Jeweled Lute?"
He shook his head. “She doesn't choose husbands. She just sells her body. In love there is no element of buying or selling. Love is not a business, but a life work."
Lotus Charm thought awhile. She held her sturdy brown ankle in her strong slim hands. “Teacher Meng, if I were to make a friend of a man would that be wrong?"
“No — not in itself."
“If I decided to marry him myself would that be wrong?"
“Not to my way of thinking."
“Would a marriage like that be happier than the one my sister is entering into?"
“It all depends."
“On what?"
“I can't say exactly. I told you there is never a definite answer to such problems."
“Then we'll leave marriage aside. Now if I have a man friend and my parents don't like him, what should I do?"
“Fight for him, if he is worthwhile."
“How will I know if a man is worthy?"
“How can I tell you that?You should be able to tell." Meng Liang sighed. “You see, your problem is like a vicious circle, one circle within another. I think it would be more profitable for us to go on with our studies."
Lotus Charm did little work that day. Why hadn't Mr. Meng answered her questions?He ought to have told her everything. Her confidence in him was shaken. He had talked about everything as if he had no real interest in her problem, and yet he had suggested that she had the right to choose her own husband. He had agreed to everything she had said, and even advised her to oppose her parents. What kind of man was he to give such advice so casually and yet dodge answering the main questions.
She decided to ask him again. She would frame her questions to give him no escape. A mischievous thought came. She snickered. Well, perhaps he might instruct her in things besides calligraphy. The thought was so ludicrous that she snickered till her stomach ached.
When the foggy season was over they went back to South Warm Springs. Pao Ching had not had a good season in Chung-king because the Tang troupe had cut into his earnings, though not enough to ruin him. The theater_going population of Chungking was divided into two classes:those who liked more sex and less music, and those who liked music and its consequent exaltation. The latter were Pao Ching's faithful clients. Pao Ching had come through with enough to eat and enough to live through the summer season.
He was anxious to get Phoenix Girl married. Since she had become betrothed to Sergeant Tao it seemed as if he had taken on a new responsibility. It was the first time that he had been really aware of the burden of looking after his only daughter. He felt sometimes as if he were handling a priceless piece of antique china, which would be ruined if chipped or cracked. Such responsibilities a father had. When a girl had decided to get married you never knew what she might do or what some impudent rascal might attempt.
So he planned the marriage the moment they got back to the village. Lotus Charm was more thrilled about the prospect of her sister's wedding than anyone in the family. She felt as if she were seeing a play at first hand, in a good seat. She would be able to note what difference marriage made to a girl, and whether her sister was really happy. Then she would be able to measure her own chances of happiness. How exciting. There were nights she could not sleep from sheer wonder.
Phoenix Girl was as quietly morose about everything as ever. She worked hard sewing her trousseau, and Lotus Charm noticed that sometimes she smiled to herself, as if she was enjoying a dream. She understood the smile. Poor Phoenix Girl wanted so desperately to leave home, to be a person on her own, to escape this untidy place presided over by a drunken mother. Her urge to leave was so strong that she wasn't in the least bit scared of sleeping with a man she didn't know.
As the day for the marriage approached, Useless Fang progressed farther and farther into a drinking bout with his sister_in_law. He drank to keep Mrs. Fang company, because he felt it was a shame she should be the only drunken one in the family, and he did not want her to lose face. Besides, he felt sad at losing Phoenix Girl. Never had she given any trouble to anyone, never had she cost the family any extra money. Always she had been a quiet willing household slave. And now she was going.
Mrs. Fang ordinarily cared little for Phoenix Girl, but as she became more intoxicated she remembered that this was her daughter, her own flesh and blood, and that she would be unhappy if Sergeant Tao did not treat her well. These were motherly sentiments well pickled in wine, which made them taste better than if they were taken plain.
Lotus Charm wanted to tell her mother that she was willing to take Phoenix Girl's place in her heart, and in the house. But she decided that this was not the appropriate moment. She could not help remembering that her mother was weeping and moaning because Phoenix Girl was getting married, but that she had not shed a tear when she was in danger of being thrown to Commander Wang as an unwilling concubine.
Suddenly Lotus Charm heard a commotion in the living room. She went to the door. Her mother was shrieking at the top of her voice, and her uncle Useless Fang was yawning. Her mother's words struck a chill into her unhappy heart. She felt dizzy all at once, and then fired with a furious rage. “When Phoenix Girl is gone," her mother was saying, “I'll have a wonderful time. I'm going to get a baby boy, and bring him up as my own. There are loads of war orphans, aren't there? I'll take a good one — a little bastard with big eyes, old enough not to wet his pants."
So her mother would never love her. That was clear. Whether she made money singing or sleeping with men, her mother would never be satisfied. She was just a drum singer without a real mother. What kind of world was this, anyhow?She felt bitter and drained, as if her blood had turned to ice and had frozen in her heart. Even the thought that her father was kind, did not help. He meant well, but what could he do?He couldn't answer her questions, he couldn't be a mother and a father as well.
She felt him beside her, and turned. He looked older and tired, but his eyes were bright. He touched her shoulder and said in a whisper, “Never mind, Lotus Charm, when you get married I'll make your wedding ten times as grand. The biggest wedding ever. Do please believe me."
She turned away and went back into the bedroom. Why had he said that?Did he think she was jealous?She wasn't jealous. She just hated the world and everything in it. Tears came to relieve her.